Monday, December 17, 2007

The Big Fat Fly Swatter


Paralysis episodes really defy definition. How do I describe being totally aware of every noise, smell, sound and stimulus without being able to respond to noise, light, smell, sound or itches. How can I communicate what it is like to lay there completely unable to move ... willing my muscles to move and yet, no movement occurs? There are no words ... except maybe that it feels like being swatted with a 50 cubic foot fly swatter.


Yesterday was one of the hardest paralysis days that I have had in a year or two. I woke with trouble and by the time a couple of hours had passed, I was unable to speak without going into another episode. Today was the same until about 2:00 today. Now, I'm answering phone calls, doing support tickets and working on a spreadsheet. God really equips us for His purposes. All too often we think we have the "plan" and are working it well. Then God reaches down to remind us that all that matters is His Glorification and working His Plan.

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